Sunday, February 21, 2016

2016 Pre-Season Profile: Minnesota Twins

The Minnesota Twins are an easy team to overlook in the AL Central, however last season showed that they are a team worth paying attention to.  Will that trend continue in 2016?

Last Season
My 2015 Prediction: 5th in AL Central
2015 Results: 83-79, 2nd in AL Central
The Twins ended up being possibly the biggest surprise of the 2015 season.  No one expected much from them entering the season with their young roster and rookie coach, Paul Molitor.  With many people, including myself, predicting Minnesota to be in the cellar of their division, they instead ended up competing for a Wild Card spot down to the last few weeks of the season.

2016 Additions / Subtractions
As could be expected in Minnesota, the Twins had a fairly quiet offseason.  Torii Hunter retired, and Mike Pelfrey left in free agency.  Aaron Hicks was traded to the Yankees for backup catcher John Ryan Murphy.  They signed Korean slugger Byung Ho Park to be their DH as well.  That's about it.  Really, their biggest addition this offseason is getting a year older for some of their rising stars.

Most Important Hitter
Miguel Sano
Miguel Sano was a big part of the Twins' success in 2015 as a rookie.  For the Twins to have similar success in 2016, Sano needs to continue to progress into the stud power hitter he showed he could be last year.  What makes this a bit of a mystery is his projected change in position.  Sano was primarily at DH last year, with a handful of games at third and first base.  With Park slated as the new DH, Sano has been moved to rightfield, a position he has never played before.  Will his bat make up for a potential liability in the field?

Most Important Pitcher
Ervin Santana
Last season, the Twins actually tried to make a free agent splash by signing Ervin Santana to bolster their rotation.  Then he was suspended for PED's.  He finished the season fine, but missing that much time makes the season somewhat lost for Santana.  Now he needs to come back this season as the potential frontline starter he can be.

Player to Watch
Jose Berrios
By this point, everyone knows about Byron Buxton, one of the top prospects in baseball for several years who still has his rookie status thanks to some injuries.  He is slated to start in centerfield, especially with the trade of Aaron Hicks.  I'm going a different direction with a player also prime to make an impact for the Twins in 2016.  Jose Berrios is a 21 year-old, hard-throwing, right-handed pitcher with electric stuff.  Look for him to make his big league debut at some point this season and fill any rotation spot that might open up at some point during the season.

2016 Prediction
3rd in AL Central
The Twins over-achieved last season.  A slight backslide is not unreasonable.  I think they will have a similar season to 2015.  They might drop a slot in the standings simply because of the improvements made in other teams in the division.  They are definitely heading in the right direction and could possibly be making the playoffs and maybe more by 2018.

Fearless Prediction
Byron Buxton will either win AL Rookie of the Year or play less than 81 games.
Byron Buxton has the potential of being another Mike Trout unleashed on Major League Baseball.  One of the main reasons he hasn't yet is injuries.  He is close to gaining the label of "injury proned."  This season is important to see which way Buxton will go.  Either he will be baseball's next superstar, or he will take another step towards being a prospect that never got to fulfill his potential greatness.

Friday, February 19, 2016

2016 Pre-Season Profile: Chicago White Sox

The White Sox seem to be a team stuck in mediocrity.  They are never good enough to make a serious run late in the season, but they are never bad enough to start over either.  They are a team that is stuck.  Will 2016 change anything?

Last Season
My 2015 Prediction: 3rd in AL Central
2015 Results: 76-86, 4th in AL Central
Chicago tried to make some moves before 2015 to improve the team, but none of them seemed to work out.  This lead to another disappointing season for the White Sox with little to be hopeful for.

2016 Additions / Subtractions
Once again, the White Sox tried hard to improve this offseason by making improvements to their roster that will bring immediate results.  The biggest move was a trade for All Star third baseman Todd Frazier, however they gave up a lot to get him.  They also traded for Brett Lawrie, another third baseman, that they plan to play at second base.  The most underrated move made by the Chi Sox was signing catcher Alex Avila away from the Tigers.  Avila is a great game caller and can really help out the pitching staff.  They also lost some key contributors to free agency like Jeff Samardzija and Alexei Ramirez.  It could be argued the biggest move the White Sox made this offseason was the move that was never made.  They were connected to Yoenis Cespedes, but didn't sign him.  They were in talks with Justin Upton, but lost out there too.  Then there is Ian Desmond, who could fit right in at shortstop, but the White Sox seem unwilling (so far) to give up the draft pick to sign him.

Most Important Hitter
Adam LaRoche
One of the biggest signings of last offseason became the biggest disappointment for the White Sox in 2015.  Adam LaRoche truly showed signs of his age for the first time, hitting just .207 and 12 home runs after hitting .259 and 26 homers the year before for the Nationals.  If the White Sox want to start to show signs of improvement, LaRoche needs to have a bounce back year, and they need to hope the newly-acquired Frazier and Lawrie don't fall into a similar slump.

Most Important Pitcher
Carlos Rodon
Carlos Rodon had a strong rookie season in 2015 for the White Sox.  He should take some strides forward in his sophomore season.  The problem is after not re-signing Samardzija, they have a hole in their rotation that they didn't really address.  Behind Chris Sale, there is no true number two starter now.  Carlos Rodon needs to take some massive steps forward and become that top line starter behind Sale that the White Sox need.

Player to Watch
Tim Anderson
The White Sox's top prospect is projected to be ready at some point in 2016.  He is a natural shortstop, but look for him to make an appearance if there are any injuries or slow starts from Brett Lawrie at second base or Tyler Saladino at shortstop.

2016 Prediction
5th in AL Central
Despite the moves the White Sox made this offseason, they look more like Band-Aids to try and hold together a team that needs to be blown up and started over.  They refuse to go all in to win now by making the few extra moves needed to make them a contender, like signing Cespedes, Upton, or Desmond.  They have a legitimate ace in Chris Sale, but no help behind him.  At the same time, they refuse to rebuild by trading away top players to rebuild the farm system and build young.  Instead, they keep trading prospects away.  Todd Frazier is a nice pickup, but they need more than that to win.  Until they decide whether to go all in for now or for the future, they will never get better.

Fearless Prediction
Manager Robin Ventura will be fired before the All Star Break.
I think Robin Ventura has the potential to be a great manager.  The problem is if this season is disappointing at all, he is most likely to be blamed.  He barely made it through the 2015 season with his job.  Another mediocre to poor season will certainly cost him his job, whether it is his fault or not.

Thursday, February 18, 2016

2016 Pre-Season Profile: New York Yankees

In the last couple days, pitchers and catchers have started to report to Spring Training.  This means baseball season is just around the corner.  Every year, the baseball offseason is one of the most interesting in all of sports as teams work to remake and revamp their teams through trades, free agents, or their farm system.  No sport has rosters as fluid in the offseason as baseball.  This makes Spring Training an exciting time for all baseball fans as we get our first look at what each team looks like this year.  Last year, I attempted to write a prediction article for every team in the league.  I came up a little short when the season started.  This season, I am starting with the teams I didn't get to last season, starting with the Yankees.

Last Season
My 2015 Prediction: 4th in AL East
2015 Results: 87-75, 2nd in AL East, WILD CARD, lost to Astros in Wild Card Game
The Yankees really overachieved last year with an aging roster.  The resurgence of players like Mark Teixeira and Alex Rodriguez led to an unexpected playoff birth for the Pinstripes in 2015.  However, a quick exit also came for them when they ran into the young upstart Astros.

2016 Additions / Subtractions
These are not the Yankees we are used to seeing in the offseason.  They came out early on in the winter to say they were not going to sign any of the big ticket free agents.  High price tags still placed on aging stars like Teixeira, A-Rod, Carlos Beltran, and CC Sabathia can even scare off the deepest of pocketbooks from spending.  However, it didn't stop them completely from making improvements to their roster.  They pulled off a trade for Starlin Castro as they continue to look for a replacement for Robinson Cano at second base.  The big move everyone has been talking about though is Aroldis Chapman coming in to give the Yankees a "super bullpen" that rivals the Royals of the past couple years.

Most Important Hitter
Mark Teixeira
For the Yankees to have another great season this year, all of their aging stars need to repeat their performance from the year before.  The most important of these is Mark Teixeira, mainly because of his insurance policy is no longer available.  Greg Bird, who had a really solid 2015 season, was meant to split time with Tex at first to keep him fresh.  However, shoulder surgery has knocked him out for the year, putting all the pressure back on the veteran.  Now, if nothing changes, the Yankees' option at first base if Tex gets hurt is Dustin Ackley.  I know from experience as a Mariners fan that that is not a strong option.  Teixeira has to be great.

Most Important Pitcher
Masahiro Tanaka
Tanaka is being counted on as the ace of the Yankees' staff, however since an elbow injury halfway through his first season, Tanaka has been much less than that.  Since then, his elbow has been a ticking time bomb waiting for if and/or when that ligament will tear the rest of the way and he will need Tommy John.  The Yankees can't have that happen this season.  Not only that, but he needs to be the ace of the staff again.  He needs to pitch more than his 2015 total of 150 innings and get his ERA back down under 3.00 (3.51 in 2015).  If that happens, he will once again anchor that starting rotation.

Player to Watch
Robert Refsnyder
This spot is reserved for a player that could have a breakout rookie season in 2016.  I would say Luis Severino for this spot, but he played too much in 2015 to still qualify as a rookie.  The Yankees have higher profile prospects (Aaron Judge, Jorge Mateo), but Refsnyder has the biggest opportunity to make an impact on this year's season.  He is listed as a second baseman, but the Yankees are hoping he can become their "super utility" along the lines of guys like Ben Zobrist and Josh Harrison.  After being a star for Arizona's CWS 2012 championship, he is no stranger to the pressures he will face playing in New York.  He has a good chance of making the Opening Day roster and having a big impact all around the field.

2016 Prediction
5th in AL East
I do not have much faith in the Yankees this year.  There are way too many question marks for this team.  Can Mark Teixeira stay healthy? Can Alex Rodriguez repeat his bounce back season?  Does Carlos Beltran have one more stellar season in him?  Can CC Sabathia return to former glory?  Will Masahiro Tanaka's elbow hold up another season?  How long will Aroldis Chapman be suspended for his off-the-field problems this offseason?  They have a roster that can win, but I don't see every one of these scenarios working out in the Yankees' favor in 2016, which is what has to happen for them to compete in the highly-competitive AL East.

Fearless Prediction
Aroldis Chapman will not end the season as a Yankee.
Aroldis Chapman was brought in by the Yankees with just one year left on his contract to bolster what was already one of the best bullpens in baseball.  If the team has the type of season I am predicting they have, don't be surprised if the Yankees turn around and unload the flame-throwing closer at the Trade Deadline for a haul of prospects and hit the reset button on that whole experiment.

Wednesday, February 17, 2016

SNL 41.12 Review - Larry David, The 1975

Original Airdate - 2/6/16

Larry David became quite the hit around the Saturday Night Live circles after he was brought in a couple times this season to give a spot-on Bernie Sanders impression.  So when it was announced that he would be hosting, it seemed like a natural next step.  Bringing in one of the Seinfeld creators to help write some sketch comedy had to come up with some great material.  It certainly did.

Cold Opening

One of the benefits of bringing back Darrell Hammond to be SNL's resident Donald Trump is it has freed up Taran Killam to bring to life Ted Cruz, an impression he is much better at.  This is the first non-debate sketch to feature Cruz, who is looking more and more like a legitimate presidential candidate.  It was a solid sketch that we can expect more of before the season is over.

Monologue

Few people are as naturally funny as Larry David.  Listening to him talk about anything will make you laugh pretty quickly.  It was no surprise then that his monologue was a true monologue.  He is one of the few people that can really say whatever they want, and it would still be endearing.  This was no exception.

Weekend Update





There were three visitors to the Update desk this week.  First, we have our weekly visit from Kate McKinnon.  With the release of Barbies of all shapes and sizes, Kate debuts Sturdy Barbie in a way only Kate can pull off.  Next comes the first appearance at the Update desk for new castmember Jon Rudnitsky, who reenacts his version of Dirty Dancing.  It was so strange and wonderful that in any other episode, it would have ended the segment.  However, there was also Zoolander and Hansel talking politics.  That is kind of hard to top.  This was possibly the best set of guests to the Update desk this season.

Best Sketch

This was a sketch that forced everyone to do a double take.  In a simulation exercise at the FBI, cadets are trained on shooting at threats and not at civilians, but then someone pops up that they don't know what to do with.  It takes a second to fully realize that Kevin Roberts is in fact Larry David.  It's quite the disguise and quite the sketch because of it.

Worst Sketch

My favorite thing about this episode is there really wasn't a bad sketch.  If I had to pick one, this would probably be it, mainly because SNL did a terrible job at keeping the secret of the sketch.  After some interaction among the people on the boat, out pops Bernie Sanders to have a conversation with his impersonator.  It's a great sketch, but Sanders's appearance on the show was released to the press two days or so before the episode was aired.  It ruined the surprise.

Dark Horse Sketch

As a teacher, I fully appreciate the brilliance of this sketch.  It's a little silly and goofy, but too good not to share.  Iguana?  Wanna?

Grade
It's hard to go a whole episode without a bad sketch.  Somehow, this episode did.  Larry David needs to host more often if this is the result.  He is one of those hosts that instantly makes every sketch funnier.  Add to that such a strong Weekend Update, and this is one of the stronger episodes of the season.

***A***

View the full episode here:

Friday, February 5, 2016

Zach's Fearless NFL Predictions 2016: Super Bowl 50


In honor of the 50th anniversary of the nation's greatest sporting spectacle not on pay-per-view, here are 50 amazing facts about Super Bowl 50 (not Super Bowl L, you dummy):

1. The 2015 Broncos scored 355 points and allowed 296 points.  Amazingly, the 1973 Broncos scored 354 points and allowed 296 points.  The 2015 Broncos went 12-4 and made the Super Bowl; the 1973 Broncos went 7-5-2 and missed the playoffs.

2. Just in case you forgot, the 1973 Broncos scored 354 points in 14 games, while it took the 2015 Broncos 16 games to reach that mark.

3. In 2015, 39-year-old Broncos QB Peyton Manning threw for 2,249 yards, 9 touchdowns and 17 interceptions. In 1973, 35-year-old Broncos QB Charley Johnson threw for 2,465 yards, 20 touchdowns, and 17 interceptions. Manning finished 27th in the NFL in pass yards; Johnson finished 3rd.

4. Between Manning and Brock Osweiler, Broncos quarterbacks combined for 23 interceptions, the worst in the league.

5. Since 1990, 85 NFL teams have thrown 23 interceptions in a single season. Of those 85, only 11 made the playoffs. 

6. The combined playoff records of those previous 10 teams before the 2015 Broncos: 2-10.  None of those teams ever made it past the divisional round.

7. The 2015 Broncos committed 31 turnovers.  In the past 30 years, only one team (the 1999 Rams) committed 31 turnovers and won the Super Bowl. 

8. The Broncos joined the 4-12 Cowboys and 5-11 49ers in being the only teams in the league which never scored more than 31 points in a game all season.

9. In the last 25 years, every Super Bowl team has scored over 31 points during the season at least once.


10. Week 1, the Ravens had the football at the Denver 16 yard line with 36 seconds left.  Joe Flacco threw a pass to the end zone that was intercepted by Darian Stewart.  Denver won 19-13.

11. Week 2, the Chiefs led Denver by 7 with 40 seconds left.  The Broncos scored a touchdown, kicked off, and scored off a Jamaal Charles fumble at the 20 yard line.  Denver won 31-24.

12. In the fourth quarter of Week 4, Teddy Bridgewater completed 11 of 13 passes for 127 yards and Adrian Peterson ran for 47 yards and a touchdown.  Down by 3, the Vikings had the ball at their own 47 with 35 seconds left when Bridgewater was stripped-sacked.  Denver won 23-20.

13.  Week 6, the Raiders gained 139 yards in the fourth quarter (the Broncos gained only 30), but lost when David Carr’s pass was intercepted and returned 74 yards for a touchdown by Chris Harris.  Denver won 16-10.

14. Week 7, the Browns trailed the Broncos by 3 and had a first down at the Denver 11 with 1:47 left.  They kicked a field goal to tie the game.  Miraculously, they got the ball back in Denver territory with 53 seconds remaining, until Josh McCown threw an interception.  In overtime, they had a first down at the Denver 39.  The plays that followed: A run for a 3 yard loss, an 8-yard sack, a 2-yard sack, and a 5-yard delay of game penalty.  Denver won in overtime 26-23.

15. Week 11, the Bears trailed 17-9 and scored a touchdown with 29 seconds left.  The 2-point conversion failed.  The Broncos won 17-15 in a game where they punted 7 times.

16. Week 12, the Patriots led 21-7 in the fourth quarter and were getting the ball back.  Chris Harper, a backup signed off the practice squad, fumbled the punt return.  After Dont’a Hightower and Rob Gronkowski were knocked out of the game, the Broncos won 30-24 in overtime.

17.  Week 16, the Bengals, led by A.J. McCarron, had a 14-0 lead 29 minutes into the game before they collapsed in the second half.  Although the Broncos had a fumble and missed field goal in the fourth quarter, they still won 20-17 in overtime.

18.  Week 17, the 4-11 Chargers forced 5 turnovers and led by 3 points with 10 minutes left. San Diego scored only scored 10 points off the 5 Denver turnovers.  The Broncos won 27-20.

19.  In the AFC Divisional Round, the Steelers played without their top two runningbacks and its top wide receiver. Pittsburgh led by 4 in the fourth quarter and was driving in Denver territory until fourth-string runningback Fitzgerald Toussaint fumbled. The Broncos won 23-16 in a game where they didn’t score a touchdown in the first 57 minutes of play.
              
20. In the AFC Championship Game, the Patriots had the ball inside the Denver 20 yard line on three separate drives. Denver punted 9 times and was outgained by 92 yards and 8 first downs.  The Broncos won 20-18.

21. Just to review, that’s 11 victories that Denver easily could have (and in many cases, deserved to have) blown.  Including the playoffs, the Broncos went 11-3 in games decided by a touchdown or less – the most close wins ever by a Super Bowl team.  By contrast, the 2015 Giants and Ravens went a combined 8-15 in such games.


22. Combined record of Denver’s opponents away from home in 2015: 56-72.  The Broncos played only two games away from home against opponents with winning records: Kansas City (the Jamaal Charles fumble) and Pittsburgh (a game they lost 34-27).

23. Excluding playoffs, total first downs surrendered to home opponents: 118.  Total first downs surrendered to road opponents: 171.

24. The combined QB rating of the Broncos quarterbacks (76.3) was worse than the combined QB rating of all the quarterbacks Denver faced (78.8).  The other teams which fared the same (along with their records): Minnesota (11-5), Indianapolis (8-8), Philadelphia (7-9), St. Louis (7-9), New York Giants (6-10), Chicago (6-10), San Francisco (5-11), Baltimore (5-11), Jacksonville (5-11), Dallas (4-12), Tennessee (3-13), Cleveland (3-13).

25. The last quarterback to win a Super Bowl after a season in which he threw more interceptions than touchdowns?  Len Dawson in 1969.  Dawson was also the last QB to win a Super Bowl after throwing under 10 TDs for the season (min. 3 starts).  Yes, those last two stats include Brad Johnson and Trent Dilfer.


26. The 2015 Panthers won 15 regular season games, only the 7th such NFL team ever to do so. No 15-1 team has ever lost a Super Bowl.

27. Week 2, Carolina led Houston 24-10 with 7:00 remaining the fourth quarter.  Carolina won 24-17.

28. Week 3, Carolina led New Orleans 27-16 with 5:00 remaining in the fourth quarter.  Carolina won 27-22.

29. Week 4, Carolina led Tampa Bay 37-17 with 1:00 remaining in the fourth quarter.  Carolina won 37-23.

30. Week 8, Carolina led Indianapolis 23-6 with 8:00 remaining in the fourth quarter.  Carolina won 26-23 in overtime.

31. Week 9, Carolina led Green Bay 37-14 with 8:00 remaining in the fourth quarter.  Carolina won 37-29.

32. Week 11, Carolina led Washington 44-14 with 1:00 remaining in the fourth quarter.  Carolina won 44-16.

33. Week 12, Carolina led Dallas 33-6 with 5:00 remaining in the fourth quarter. Carolina won 33-14.

34. Week 16, Carolina led New York 35-21 with 6:00 remaining in the fourth quarter.  Carolina won 38-35.

35. In the NFC Divisional Round, Carolina led Seattle 31-14 with 7:00 remaining in the fourth quarter.  Carolina won 31-24. 

36. Considering all the meaningless fourth quarter points given up, it’s reasonable to say that of the 308 points Carolina surrendered on the season, 75 of them (24.4%) came in garbage time (this excludes the playoffs).


37. OK, OK, you Peyton apologists: Some of those games (such as Indianapolis, Green Bay, and New York) were admittedly not truly garbage time points because the opponent actually came back and put Carolina’s win at least temporarily in some degree of doubt.  But even if you take out those three games, that’s still 29 garbage time points on the season. Denver’s supposedly “vastly superior” defense gave up 296 total points in 2015; Carolina’s gave up 308.  Do the math.

38. Carolina gets an unfair reputation for playing an easy schedule.  In reality, they defeated Seattle twice, beat Arizona by 34 points, scored 37 points against the Packers, beat playoff teams in Washington and Houston, and defeated the Cowboys on Thanksgiving with a healthy Romo starting (but not finishing).

39. One more tidbit about Carolina’s unfairly-criticized schedule: Through the first eight weeks, the Panthers only won one game by 14 or more points.  In their ten games since then, they’ve had six victories by 14+ points. 

40. Carolina was 6-0 in games against Super Bowl-winning QBs.  Three of those wins came on the road.  Denver went 5-1 in games against Super Bowl-winning QBs, but all five of those wins were at home.  The sole loss (against Pittsburgh) came on the road.

41. This season, 23 defensive players had 4 or more interceptions.  Four of them were Panthers (Kurt Coleman, Thomas Davis, Luke Kuechly, Josh Norman).  By contrast, Denver’s leader in interceptions was Aqib Talib, with 3.

42. Carolina rushed for 144 yards against Seattle in the NFC Divisional Round.  That was the most rush yards allowed by the Seahawks’ defense in 27 games – since November 16, 2014, when they gave up 190 to the Chiefs. Going into the game, Russell Wilson had never faced a deficit larger than 21 points.  Carolina jumped out to a 31-point lead 24 minutes into the game.

43. Carolina’s 49-15 win over Arizona in the NFC Championship Game was, according to Football Outsiders’ DVOA metric, the 8th most dominant single-game performance by a team in NFL history.  DVOA ranks it as the 2nd most dominant playoff performance ever, behind San Francisco’s 44-3 walloping of the Giants in 1994.

44. That was Phil Simms’ final game as an NFL QB.  Sorry, just had to throw that in there.


45. One more thing regarding DVOA: According to the metric, Denver is coming off wins over the 7th and 6th best teams, respectively.  Carolina is coming off victories over the 1st and 5th ranked teams, respectively.

46. As a team, Carolina has rushed for 100+ yards in 31 consecutive games, dating back to Week 5 of 2014. Denver did go 5-2 in games allowing over 100 yards rushing this season, but all five of those wins were the bullshit-style wins aforementioned in #10-18 on this list.

47. Since December 1, 2014, the Panthers have gone 22-2.  They have a +31 turnover margin over that span.

48. Since December 1, 2014, Cam Newton and Steph Curry have combined for 136 wins, 24 losses, and one championship (for now).

49. Since 2011 (Cam’s first season on the Panthers), Carolina leads the NFL in rushing touchdowns win 90, ranks 3rd in total rushing yards, 4th in yards per rush, and 7th in total wins – not bad for a team that has had only two winning seasons in five years. 

50. Cam Newton has thrown for over 340 yards only three times: His first (422 yards), second (432 yards), and fourth starts (374 yards) as an NFL quarterback.

All right, so that last fact doesn’t really supply a meaningful case for which team will win Super Bowl 50, but it’s still an amazing and quirky stat.  Cam’s most prolific passing days occurred when he was at his most raw and inexperienced.  How many other successful quarterbacks can you say that about?  By contrast, Peyton Manning’s greatest passing day (479 yards in a 2014 win over Arizona) came on his 244th regular-season start, in the middle of his 16th season.  And it’s the same case across the board: Tom Brady’s best passing day (517 yards) occurred on his 146th game, Ben Roethlisberger’s (522 yards) on his 151st game, and Eli Manning’s (510 yards) on his 123rd.
Of course, Cam has a much smaller sample size (78 regular season and 5 playoff games) and his transformation into a (somewhat) more conventional pocket passer has been well-documented.  Whatever he did in the offseason prior to 2015 to elevate his game, it has worked; going into the season, he had a win-loss record under .500, only one playoff win (over Ryan Lindlay) and a lifetime QB rating of 85.2.  In 2015, he was the presumptive league MVP and it wasn’t even close.  But the (correct) question on everyone’s minds is: How will he perform on the game’s biggest stage against the league’s best defense?
Obviously, after reading those 50 facts, you should have some coherent idea about where I stand on this game.  But it’s also true that I tend to choose games with my heart rather than my brain; three weeks ago, right after the Steelers and Seahawks pulled out unbelievable wins at the last second, I was ready to send everything to hell and proclaim another disastrous Denver-Seattle Super Bowl.  But one week later, the Patriots restored my confidence and I thought they were a lock to beat Denver.  I purposefully overlooked Brady’s shaky record in Denver and Manning’s ability to play well at home in sunny weather after two months of rest and sustenance courtesy of Rocco and Gino.
            I have a rooting interest in this game and it is the Carolina Panthers, a franchise I’ve been rooting for since the days of Steve Beuerlein and Tim Biakabutuka.  I even felt a little sad after my team beat them in the Super Bowl 12 years ago and unless they were playing the Patriots or Saints, I can’t really remember any games I ever rooted against them.  So let’s forget about my heart (or my brain) for a second, and play a game of “worst-case scenario.”  Let’s try to imagine the hypothetical circumstances enabling the Broncos to win Super Bowl 50:


            First, Von Miller and DeMarcus Ware will have to dominate the Panthers’ offensive line, particularly on the outside, where tackles Michael Oher and Mike Remmers may be vulnerable.  Of course they had little difficulty doing that against the Patriots, but if they are able to beat the tackles, the Broncos’ pass rush also must cover the middle of the field in order to prevent plays like this from happening.  Denver was successful two weeks ago because Wade Phillips never blitzed, which is something they’ll have to continue to do in the Super Bowl since the Panthers have a quarterback who isn’t exactly intimidated by blitzes.
The Denver secondary will also have to eliminate downfield passes, which of course they were also very good at this season.  It’s not unthinkable to believe that Aqib Talib, Chris Harris, and T.J. Ward can capably cover the likes of Greg Olson, Philly Brown, and Ted Ginn (who may not even require too much coverage due to his fairly egregious drop rate).  Forcing the Panthers into third-and-longs and eliminating long completions or scrambles is a great gameplan for the Broncos, and again, it’s not inconceivable that they could do this.  Denver was middle-of-the-pack when it came to picking off passes, but remember that the Broncos 14-1 (including the playoffs) when forcing at least one takeaway.
            The problem comes when you try to draw up a best-case scenario for the Denver offense.  It’s a given that Manning must be turnover-free and perhaps get some assistance from calls (or no calls) on the field.  The Broncos will need Emmanuel Sanders and Demaryius Thomas to have serious YAC (yards after catch) numbers, which could be possible if Manning targets the receiver not covered by Josh Norman; Robert McClain, filling in for an injured Peanut Tillman, has looked shaky at times this postseason.  Denver hasn’t been great running the ball in the last two games, but C.J. Anderson has broken off a couple of 30-yard runs which put the Broncos in field goal range in both games.  You have to wonder about the health of Thomas Davis and Jared Allen, and if Carolina opts to send a blitz against Manning, perhaps the offensive line can give him or Anderson enough time to burn the linebackers. 
            The issue is that even if the Broncos play well on offense, they probably won’t score more than 20-24 points.  Defenses know that Manning cannot throw the ball more than 15 yards or escape from pressure, and they also know that the Broncos’ conservative gameplan calls more for clock management and field position than explosiveness.  The best case scenario for the Broncos is that they take an early lead, preferably 7-0 or 10-0.  This eliminates pressure to pick up yardage and can enable Anderson and Ronnie Hillman to run out the clock.  Denver’s special teams have quietly been strong too, so keeping the Panthers inside their own 20 yard line (like they did so often against the Patriots) will be of paramount importance.  If the Broncos make it a game of field position, eliminate Cam’s comfort in the pocket, and benefit from some timely magic from the Sheriff, they can win the game.  They’re certainly the healthier team, the more experienced team, and just beat two quarterbacks who combined for six titles.  And let’s not forget who’s announcing.


            Writing this, it admittedly makes me feel a little uneasy about the “surefire” prediction that Carolina will beat Denver.  Haven’t we seen the Broncos execute this exact gameplan all season?  After all, as the 2003-2004 Patriots famously demonstrated, winning games in the clutch is a more important skill than winning blowouts.  But after thinking about it, there are three main reasons I still like the Panthers:
            1. Denver hasn’t faced a quarterback like Cam Newton all season.  In fact, the best rushing quarterbacks they squared off against were Andrew Luck and Alex Smith – in games the Broncos both lost.  On top of this, it’s virtually impossible to gameplan against Cam Newton because (recalling stat #47) no one in the league has figured him out.  Even if you take out his top receiver (Kelvin Benjamin), give him an oft-injured, second-tier runningback (Jonathan Stewart) and a very average offensive line (with Michael Oher, for god’s sake), he still puts up a 17-1 league MVP season.  That kind of transcendent skill is impossible to prepare for and contain.
            2. I trust Carolina in a neutral site more than Denver.  No one talks about the air pressure in Denver, which certainly had an effect on players like Gronkowski two weeks ago.  It takes the wind out of opponents, and extends the kicking game, which favors a defensive-oriented team like the Broncos.  Denver is coming off four straight home games where their average margin of victory was 4.75 points.  Their most impressive road wins were at Detroit Week 3 and at San Diego Week 13.  The Panthers weren’t exactly great away from home either, but did win in Seattle, New Orleans, and New York (all of which, the last I saw, were more impressive than Detroit or San Diego).  The NFC was tougher than the AFC, and I believe that being away from home impairs the Broncos more so than the Panthers (fact #22 really sticks out here).
            3. Denver’s style of play fits right into Carolina’s hands.  Manning turns over the ball a lot; the Panthers are the league’s best team at takeaways.  Denver eliminates deep passes and pressures the QB; the Panthers are a run-first offense (not exactly the strengths of Pittsburgh and New England) and Cam Newton is the best in the league at avoiding pressure.  In close games, Denver controls the clock and slows the pace down; in 6 of the 8 quarters they’ve played this postseason, Carolina has done the same thing, except with double-digit leads.  Even if you want to concede that Denver’s defense is the best in football, you also have to say that Carolina’s offense is the best.  And if you want to say that Carolina’s defense is one of the best in football, you have to also admit that Denver’s offense . . . well, isn’t.
            Teams that finished the season ranked #1 in total defense are 9-2 in Super Bowls.  Defense wins championships more so than offenses, sure.  But for Denver to win the game, Carolina is going to have to make mistakes – mistakes like missing an extra point or having your fourth-string runningback fumble or turning the ball away with seconds remaining.  Could Carolina make these devastating mistakes?  I mean, if Russell Wilson can, anyone can.  But unlike the Patriots last year, the way this Denver team wins games necessitates that such mistakes are made.  So maybe Cam Newton fumbles at the goal-line in the fourth quarter?  Maybe Graham Gano misses a 25-yard field goal?  Maybe Josh Norman has a chance to pick off Peyton Manning’s game-winning pass, but it slips through his hands?  All of those scenarios are in the cards.  But if the game is played 100 times, how often do each of those events happen?  Once?  Twice?  That still leaves 96 or 97 other scenarios.  At first I thought picking Carolina was going with my heart, but it actually seems fairly clear that it’s really going with my head.


Prediction: Carolina 37, Denver 13.

Doppelganger: Do we really have to look that far?

Special Prop Bets:
Odds that Jim Nantz’s and Peyton Manning’s shared agent will make an appearance in the booth: 3/1

Odds that Rocco and Gino will hold a “friendly one-on-one” with Nantz and Simms before the game to avoid any mention of you-know-what-banned-substance: 4/1

Odds that such a meeting isn’t necessary because they weren’t going to bring it up anyway: No bet.

Odds that representatives from Papa Johns and Nationwide will personally hand the Lombardi trophy to Peyton Manning: 5/1

Odds that Simms, Roger Goodell and Eli Manning will actually be wearing pom-poms and giggling with each other about going steady with the leader of the pack: 7/2

Odds that Nantz and Simms introduce Manning by humming “Great-est-QB-of-all-time” to the annoying “Nationwide” theme: 6/5

Odds that I will copy-paste this column and the 2013 Super Bowl preview when Newton’s Panthers and Manning’s LA Rams meet in next year’s NFC Championship Game: Even. 

Saturday, January 30, 2016

SNL 41.11 Review - Ronda Rousey, Selena Gomez

Original Airdate - 1/23/16

Every now and then, SNL brings in a host that is intriguing because you have no idea what they can bring to the table.  Usually, this comes in the form of athletes.  They are the big name, but also the big unknown.  Ronda Rousey has done a little acting, but only in action films.  How would she handle the chaos of live sketch comedy?  Hopefully, it would go better than her last fight...  It did, but not by much.

Cold Opening

Donald Trump provides so much material for this show, I think he is doing everything he can now to make the show every week.  Of all the appearances so far, this one might be the best.  Sarah Palin endorsed Donald Trump.  This gave a great Trump moment along with another excuse to bring back Tina Fey to bring to life one of the most popular characters of the last decade.  It became one of the best sketches of the season so far, partially because it was not that far off from the truth.

Monologue

Many times, the monologue can get pretty routine, especially for someone without the comedy background.  However, this one was actually pretty original.  Ronda Rousey is a fighter, constantly looking for a way to win.  So she is looking for a way to win the monologue, with the help of color commentators and a coach in her corner.  It isn't the greatest monologue ever, but it was definitely different and fun.

Weekend Update




This show took place in the middle of Winter Storm Jonas that covered the east coast in snow.  Several times throughout the episode it is referenced, but my favorite had to be sending Bobby out in the snow during the Weekend Update, declaring the snow to "not be that bad."  Leslie Jones shows up and tells of her burning love for Leonardo DiCaprio.  Then, Willie shows up, who is becoming one of my favorite Update characters.  He just seems to be getting funnier and funnier.

Best Sketch

Although everything I have talked about so far has been really good, the majority of the show was average at best.  Most of what Rousey did was very ordinary.  However, there was this sketch.  Ronda Rousey plays the shy, cute high schooler going on a romantic date with the popular jock only to find out that it was a prank designed by the "cool kids."  All I can say is ... don't mess with Ronda Rousey.

Worst Sketch

Most of the rest of the sketches looked like this.  This was one of two re-hashed sketches of the night that did not deserve a second round.  The girls take turns trying to win over Taran Killam with the lamest of pick-ups.  The worst part of the sketch was the fact that the best line was the first line.  It also was way too long as if the writers didn't know how to end it.  Thank goodness Selena Gomez came to the rescue (probably the only time I will ever say that).

Dark Horse Sketch

Whenever Kyle Mooney gets to create his weird brand of comedy, it is a highlight of the show.  This time, Kyle and Beck are trying to figure out what it means to go to a party.  The ridiculous stuff they say is so fun and refreshing.

Grade
Sometimes, the writers are presented with a host that they don't know what to do with.  Usually, they try some stuff out and let them make a fool of themselves.  The problem here was they took no risks.  They looked at Ronda Rousey and used her as a pretty face almost exclusively instead of taking some risks.  Whether this was Rousey's request or a struggle from the writers, it led to a pretty boring episode that tried for way too many cheap laughs instead of actually trying to be funny.  If it wasn't for Weekend Update and Sarah Palin, this would be a prime competitor for the worst episode of the season.  As it is, it's just slightly higher than the low point of the season.

***C+***

View the full episode here:

Saturday, January 23, 2016

SNL 41.10 Review - Adam Driver, Chris Stapleton

Original Airdate - 1/16/16

Star Wars is now the highest grossing movie of all time.  It only makes sense that Saturday Night Live tries to cash in on some of that success.  They picked the perfect cast member to host their show too.  Adam Driver has been an actor known well by some and not at all by others.  Some recognized him as the boyfriend from Girls, others recognized him from minor roles in an array of random films.  I always thought of him as the weird sound effects singer from the Coens' Inside Llewyn Davis (starring fellow Star Wars actor Oscar Isaac ... he would be a great one to host too!).  Then Star Wars came out, and he is instantly recognizable by everyone.  However, one thing that you notice very quickly in this episode is that Adam Driver is really funny and, despite being known now as the epitome of evil, he is built for sketch comedy.

Cold Opening

This had to be the worst Cold Opening of the season.  Yes, there was a Republican Presidential Debate this week, and yes, SNL loves to comment on the political scene as they are very good at it.  However, the last episode before Christmas started off with a Republican Presidential Debate sketch, and this felt more like a re-run of that sketch than something fresh.  It did nothing new with the material.  They even brought back announcer Darrell Hammond to be the Donald, but even he seemed bored with it.  You can't start two shows in a row with the same sketch.  That's a rule.

Monologue

Quickly, the stale Cold Opening was forgotten as the Monologue started.  From the moment he stepped on stage, it was obvious that Adam Driver belongs there.  He commanded the room in a way few hosts know how.  He made light of his military past and thwarted off Star Wars fanboys asking him to reveal secrets.  It was a pretty standard bit, but it showed enough to realize this would be a strong episode.

Weekend Update




Pete Davidson is a strange guy.  I love it when they let him go to the Update desk and rant about something on his mind.  He keeps his material much fresher than Leslie Jones does.  We also learn some things about him every time.  He definitely enjoys making light of his own situations for the sake of comedy.  This week, the topic was gun control and the potential of letting guns into mental institutions.  Pete got pretty personal about his experiences with this, but what could have been awkward remained light enough to still get some good laughs.  Next to the Update desk came Vanessa Bayer's kid reporter, which is awkwardly adorable every time.  As far as the material from Jost and Che, it was strong as usual with the exception of one part.  Naturally, Michael Che had to comment on the lack of diversity in this year's Oscar nominations.  His comments went away from racial and instead talked about how no one ever sees the movies nominated for Oscars.  As an Oscar fan, I thought this was stupid especially this year.  First off, blockbuster films that everyone sees are usually not that high of quality.  Second, if they are, they get nominated, especially this year.  Star Wars got 5 nominations, and Mad Max: Fury Road got 10 nominations including Best Picture!  How much more do you want?  Not to mention, films like The Revenant become cultural phenomenons because of the attention they get from awards shows.  Some years, this is a relevant joke to make.  This just isn't one of those years.  Okay, I'm done.

Best Sketch


Following this episode, there were two sketches everyone as talking about.  I myself didn't see them as groundbreaking in any way, but they were culturally relevant and put SNL in a public eye like few sketches have in recent memory.  Because of that, they were the best sketches of the night.  First, you have the inevitable Star Wars sketch.  If you have the star of the biggest box office film of all time, why not use him?  The way they used him was quite clever too as he became the Undercover Boss on StarKiller Base.  The premise was better than the actual sketch, but it was still pretty funny.  Another good thing about this sketch is it was the only Star Wars sketch they did.  It can be easy to overdo something like that until it isn't funny anymore, but luckily they realized Adam Driver's ability to do pretty much anything and stayed away from Star Wars the rest of the night.  The second sketch that got attention was Aladdin's magic carpet ride that didn't go quite as planned.  First, for everyone who hadn't seen Inside Llewyn Davis, there was general shock that Adam Driver could sing.  Then they begin to realize that the skies aren't as clear and pure as they wished they were.  Cecily Strong pulls off a pretty convincing Jasmine too.

Worst Sketch

This sketch angered me so much.  It started out as something that looked like it was going to be really funny.  Adam Driver was hosting a show about funny cats where he narrated what the cats were doing.  It was ridiculous, silly, and hilarious coming from such a big guy with a deep voice.  This was all this sketch needed to be.  Instead, the cast ruined it.  Kate and Cecily came out as his French counterparts and gave their French commentary on the same clips.  Something that started out as being a lot of fun slowed to a stop once they started talking.  It was dull and boring.

Dark Horse Sketch


These two clips were my favorite parts of the episode.  First, you have a sketch that had to be written by Kyle Mooney.  He has such a strange brand of comedy.  A husband/wife team win a Golden Globe and tell their kids in the acceptance speech to go to bed.  We then see the kids listen and go to bed while the parents party all night.  It is so bizarre, but so funny at the same time.  The surprise cameo at the end just adds to the whole sketch too.  The second clip is a special appearance by SNL alum Fred Armisen.  Fred comes back quite often, but this time it was to pay tribute to the late great David Bowie.  It was a very well done and touching moment.

Grade
This was one of my favorite episodes of the season.  It was a fairly consistent episode throughout (except the Cold Opening) as it showed off the many sides of a new star not many people know much about.  Adam Driver was everything a host should, and he better be asked back often.  If they keep asking Chris Hemsworth back, Adam Driver has to be on the short list too.

***B+***

View the full episode here: